"I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean, whenever one door closes I hope one more opens..."

It's December 12th and the last couple of days have been crazy. We had our Mock Grammies at CMC last Monday, classes Tuesday, Pack day Wednesday, and Last Supper Thursday. Then Friday my parents bravely drove 7 hours down to get me and then we drove 7 hours back to home sweet home. 

Let me tell you a bit about my last days at CMC. They were...fun, bittersweet, wonderful, unforgettable and just plain amazing. I will never be the same person. At last supper we enjoyed a wonderful meal with wonderful fellowship. I didn't want the night to end. We watched the ever so funny tour video :-) Which was put together by the lovely Lisa! Following that we had a very emotional sharing time. People were sharing from their hearts and it took a lot for me to keep from crying. Here were these amazing people I would be forced to say good bye to the next day. I spoke, even though I could feel the tears forming in my eyes. Once all the sharing was over I remember hugging Lisa and just crying. I am really not one to cry in public settings but I just didn't care. I tried to hug everyone before they left knowing I might not see them the next day. My heart really did feel like it was breaking that night. It's like I loved them all so much it hurt. I wouldn't replace that night for anything. 

What's going to happen now? Well I have made a vow to myself to keep in contact with my CMC family and to one day see them all again. I also am still a little cloudy on my future but I know that God will take care of that. I am still thinking about doing publishing and more than likely I will be moving after graduation, maybe to Nashville. 

I am very grateful to have this month of break to help me recoup and to catch up on things. I did miss home a lot and I can't wait to visit Bluffton to see everyone. I am also very excited to spend time with friends from home and family. I am looking forward to many fun days ahead. 

To God, thank you for everything You are and I love you so much!!!

To my family and friends that supported me I love you all so much and I am glad to be back! 

To my mentors, profs I love you all too and I am glad to have you in my life. 

To my special CMC family, I will always have a place in my heart for you. Know that I will never forget you and you've changed my life. I love you all.

Well this is it. I have enjoyed writing this blog throughout the semester and I hope that you have enjoyed reading :)

Even though I am home a little piece of my heart will always belong to Semester 19. 


<3 MusicMajor11 

 

"I’ve given up on giving up slowly, I’m blending in so You won’t even know me apart from this whole world that shares my fate..."

I seriously had the most amazing day yesterday, two words...Relient K. Well one word and a letter. They rocked my socks, I have always wanted to see them play. Alex, Amy, Christine, and myself rode together to see the show. Our friend Kevin and a buddy of his came as well. The concert was held at Rocktown, a really neat venue in Nashville. Two other bands also played before Relient K, they were Sherwood and Deas Vail. Both bands were really good, and I was so sad that I hadn't heard of them before. The concert had some Christmas music which was wonderful, I love Christmas songs. When Relient K came on I was so pumped. They are probably one of my very favorite bands of all time. One of my favorite songs they performed was Be My Escape. This was by far my favorite show I've ever been to! 

Tonight was our Christmas party which was a lot of fun. I had a really great time with all my friends. We sang a few Christmas carols and i could feel myself tearing up a bit. I just keep realizing how much I am going to miss all these wonderful people. Another thought that I had was about the way I've presented myself. My sincere hope is that I have presented myself well to my friends here. I hope that I have been an encouragement and a fun person to be around. 

I am excited to go home but at the same time I'm scared. Knowing that I'll never be with this group of people in this setting again really bums me out. Plus a lot of things are changing in my life. One of my best friends from home just got engaged, I am so happy for her. I am really interested to see what happens when I get home and how I react to all that has changed. Even though I was just home things change. 

I have done some more thinking about my future, still not completely sure of where I'm headed. But I do feel better about it, I feel like God is closer again. I think that I will get things figured out, God knows my heart and where I need to go. I am so glad I am not just aimlessly wondering around, He's got it all under control. I love Him for that as well as everything else. God is good no matter where I am and what I am doing. I love you God <3

<3 MusicMajor11

Relient K

Matt from Relient K!

Cutest member of Relient K ;-)

 

"Don’t you give up now The sun will soon be shining You gotta face the clouds To find the silver lining..."

We are starting work on our massive final exam...21 pages! I am kind of nervous about only because it is tailored specifically to our track. Plus the whole entire semester is covered. Oh.My. Goodness. But I know that we will get through it, some of the parts are quite introspective though. They ask about what we think our purpose is and what we want to do with our lives. It is something that I really do need to think about because I am very unsure of everything right now.

I am really not sure what to feel right now. I feel very lost, the path ahead is really hard to find. I feel as though I am standing in the forest kind of like Pocahontas does in her second movie. In the scene she has just ran away from John Smith and John Rolfe. As she runs into the forest she finds a place where there are several different paths. Eventually she says "listen to the spirit within" and leaves guide her to the path she needs to take. I am trying my very hardest to listen to the spirit within to figure out where I need to go and who I need to be. Graduating college is going to completely change everything in my life. The only thing that I have ever known has been school. Now I need to go out into the real world and get a job. But not just any job, a job that will make me happy and glorify God. 

This season of uncertainty I believe is truly testing my faith. It is happening for a reason and I know that God has a purpose in it. It truly is hard to find that purpose when everything around me is going so fast. I know for sure that I am definitely not going to give up no matter how long it takes. I am going to make the best of this situation :-) So here it goes, I am going to give it my all these last days here at CMC. 


<3 MusicMajor11

"Goodbye to you Goodbye to everything I thought I knew You were the one I loved..."

It's been a long while since I've wrote...tour was fantastic and much enjoyed. My Thanksgiving break was great, had such a good time with the family. I had a good drive back to Nashville with my dad and little brother. It was really cool to return to Brentwood to find that sense of familiarity. I was so excited to see my CMC family, I love them all so much. 

I feel so strange being back, I am processing so much right now. I find my heart already breaking for the eminent departure from the CMC. I am not sure what will happen when it comes to saying good-bye. I feel torn because I really do want to return to Bluffton, it's not that. It's just when you live and work with a small community for 3 months you seriously become a family. The thought of not seeing these awesome people everyday makes me really sad. I am going to miss this so much! 

These last two weeks are pretty full with activity including the Christmas Party and Last Supper. When I looked at the schedule for our remaining time it really sunk in. It seems so strange for us to be back but only to have a few short weeks left. I feel that we will all start to get back into things only to have them come to an end. This semester has been one of the best experiences of my life so far. I couldn't imagine not coming here at this time in my life. I certainly hope anyone who is interested in this program applies. It will change your life. Forever. I have made serious life long friends here, friends that will last. 

Right now I am really trying to process what I am going to do with the rest of my life and how music is a part of that. I really want to pursue publishing, but I have no idea where to start. I know  that God has went ahead of me and made the path. He is just giving me that path one step at a time. For now I really think that I can accept that, even though it is hard. I am going to try and remain strong and still before the Lord. He'll pull through, I know He will. 

Good night Everyone!

<3 MusicMajor11

My recording family and I :D

Rachel and I :)

 

"I'm walking on sunshine whoooa and don't it feel good..."

Well tomorrow is our very last day on tour. Wow. The show's have been really good and we have all worked very hard together. It is sad to see that we are almost done, but I am excited to see my family. It's been almost three months, the longest time I have even been away from home. I feel like I have changed an grown in good ways. I have discovered things about myself that I didn't even know. I have met some really incredible people whom I will never forget. I love the CMC and I love this tour. It has been a blast being on the marketing team and getting to know people from different schools. Each school has been different in size and type of people. Which makes it fun because you can connect with so many different types of people. 


Tomorrow is our very last show at Taylor University. We leave the hotel at about ten and then we arrive at Taylor to start the unload. Everything has gone great these past three days. The tear down is so fast and everyone has done a great deal of work. It's nice to see everyone working hard to get everything together. 


Tomorrow I will be managing my last show with my artist's Winston & Julia alongside my partner Rachel. It has been a blast managing my artists and just learning about what it takes to be a band/artist manager. 


I can't express how much I love my fellow CMC'ers and this program. I will certainly miss it. Well this time tomorrow I will be with my family :-) God is so awesome. 


Well here's to the end of a really great tour!!!! 


<3 MusicMajor11

"Hanging from the ceiling Life's a mobile Spinning 'round with mixed feelings Crazy and wild Sometimes I wanna scream out loud..."

Here we are hours before our departure for tour. I believe that everything is ready...it's just a matter of being able to translate it on the road. I know we will, everyone has worked so hard for this. Even though this is an exciting time it still is a moment that came all too fast. The tour is the "capstone" portion of the semester, the high point. After that what happens? We go on Thanksgiving Break and we return only to leave a couple weeks later. I'm not sure if I am really ready for this moment. I feel as though this chapter in my life is closing and opening to one I'm not quite sure where it's headed. As a really awesome country group said.."Life's like a novel with the end ripped out.." I just keep thinking that God wrote the story of my life but He isn't letting me read it. He gives me a page at a time, a paragraph, a sentence, sometimes a word. 

I'm really struggling right now with how to feel. Home is so close, it's within reach. CMC is here and now but it's slipping away fast. I'm in some kinda of in-between state. Happy for home, excited for tour, dreading leaving this place, looking forward to Bluffton. All at one time these things seem to be hitting. I feel like I'm stuck in a whirlpool of emotion, nothing is real clear to me.

Well here it goes...CMC TOUR 2010 November 17th-20th. Don't think I'll be able to write much on the road. To all of you following this blog thank you so much. To my family know that I can't wait to be with you all and I love you. To my friends know that I miss you and care for each of you, can't wait to see you in December! To my new CMC friends I love you guys, you will all be in my heart even after the program is through. 

Here's to the journey!!

<3 MusicMajor11

Recording Family :)

Lisa, Rachel, and I

The Family again :D

"Dear Pacific day Won't you take me away? Small-town hearts of the New Year..."

Two days before tour...five days until I am HOME. Such a weird feeling let me tell you. I am sitting in on the final checks for tour. Currently the levels and mixes are being checked. This is quite a tedious process and we got started pretty late. Everything was supposed to start at nine but it didn't start till about 10:30 which has thrown a lot of things off. But I think that everything will get back on track :) 

Going home in five days is such a crazy concept. Sometimes when I think about it, it almost seems unreal. It seems like we have been here for far longer than we have. It's a good feeling though :) I love it here, so very much. I was reminded of that yesterday when my "recording family" and I had a fun day of visiting the Love Circle, Parthenon, and Radnor Lake. We had some really great times :) I will hopefully be able to post pictures soon. Also yesterday a small group of us went to the Waffle House. We had such a fun time there, I even got some mayo on me ~haha James ;)~ We also watched Dear John and fell asleep at 3am only to wake up an hour later because some of us has recording. I went to sleep at 4:30 only to wake up at 7 for registering for classes. 

Like I said I registered for classes this morning...my last semester at BU. Now that is such a weird feeling! I can't believe that I am so close to being done with college. It just seems like yesterday that I was dreaming of this CMC semester and how it seemed so far away. Also senior year just seemed so far in the distance. But now it is here and the first half is almost gone. 

I am feeling much better about my future, God has been giving me lots of peace. Even though nothing is quite nailed down I feel that everything will fall into place. I have a better idea of what department I would like to work in at a music publisher, promotion. I have done some reading on it and I think I would love it. Also I just keep thinking that my future is wiiiiide open. There are so many things that I can do with my life. So many places to visit and explore. Even though I can't see the ground below I am happy just falling...

<3 MusicMajor11 

" I realized I must be in California..."

God is so great. Can't thank Him enough for all He is. I am just so thankful for everything that is happening here at CMC. Tour is just days away...which is such a scary thought. But we are almost there, things are going relatively well. We have rehearsals, dress rehearsals, and studio these next couple days before tour. It is stressful to make sure all the schedules add up but it happened. So far it looks like I will be getting some sleep ;-) Late nights are starting to not bother me as much but I will admit I am looking forward to a regular sleep schedule! 

I still worrying about my future, it's really been on my mind lately. Where will I be when Bluffton is no longer my home? Will I live somewhere in Nashville or Ohio? I am entirely filled with questions about what will happen. I am very thankful that I have one more semester before I graduate. This is silly to worry about the more I think about it. God has had my whole life planned out from the very beginning. How foolish of me to worry when the Creator of the universe has everything under control? 

I can't believe that this program is almost through. Time here is something like trying to hold sand in my hands. It just keeps slipping by especially when we are all so busy. But the busyness is fun, it's rehearsals, studio, and classes. I would have never imagined that a place like this existed. I feel my heart already starting to break a little bit as I think of moving from this place. I know it'll settle into Bluffton and I love Bluffton. I am really excited to go back, but a part of my heart will always belong to Nashville and the CMC.

<3 MusicMajor11

"...sleepin' all day stayin' up all niiiight"

Tour is now but a week away and pressure is surely mounting. Not just on execs but techs and artists. Right now I am in recording with my recording family. I really enjoy spending time with them, even if we are all tired. My goal for this week is to stay focused and healthy. It's easy to get sick if your run down with little sleep. I didn't get much sleep yesterday and at least late night recording isn't till Thursday. 

To be honest I am nervous about tour, just a little bit. I have never been through it before and am not sure what to expect. But I have faith that it will be great, it will definitely be a growing experience for all. 

For some reason I am really at a loss for words today, I think it is just me being tired. I think I am feeling anxious for home. It's so close, I talked to my little bro last night and it made me long for home. If I could do anything right now I would be home sitting on the couch laughing with my little bro about everything. I could go for a big hug from my family right about now. I miss them so much and I really can't wait to see them. But we only have ten days left, time is just seeping through my hands like sand. 

Good night everyone!

<3 MusicMajor11

 

"I'm so tired but I can't sleep standing on the edge of something much too deep..."

Today we started up our classes again after not having them for a week. It went pretty well although I can see that the late nights are certainly catching up with everyone, including me. I have to keep focus it's hard because we all go on Thanksgiving break next Sunday/Monday. I really do miss my family a lot and I am greatly looking forward to seeing them. Even with the excitement looming in the future I keep thinking about how I am really going to miss my fellow CMC'ers. It is really amazing how much you can bond with people you have never met before in such a short period of time. One thing that I keep thinking of is that we were and are in the same boat and we stuck together. I really believe that is why we are close, and I am so thankful for it. 

We are currently a week and about a day away from CMC TOUR 2010. We have a lot of work to do in preparation for this journey. This weekend as I have been told will be a big one. We have to take down everything with the stage and then put it back up. This will help us simulate what it will be like when we go to the different schools. All of the schools we contacted are on board for the tour. We were a little concerned about one of the schools, but they pulled through :)

I was truly blessed to have a wonderful childhood. I was reminded of that yesterday when I talked to my best friend and cousin Dustin. We chatted for a very long time about life and memories we share. We always have a good laugh about what happened when we were little kids. Sometimes I wish that it were possible to go back to those memories and just relive them even for a moment. Growing up is so hard and you don't really relish being a kid until you are all grown up and about to strike out on your own. I tell my little brother to enjoy the time he has in high school this year. He will be graduated in May and that still shocks me to know he's not a little kid anymore, he is nearly an adult! How time does fly...Life seriously passes you by if you don't take time to enjoy. 

Getting unexpected phone calls from best friend's are so awesome! I just got a call from my best friend and cousin Hailey :) It is so funny how close we are because we truly think alike. I was literally just thinking about her and she called. I really love her, she is such a beautiful person. She is just like a sister to me, I am so proud of her. 

Cherish family cherish everyone because they are truly special. God I can't thank you enough for them. I love you. 

<3 MusicMajor11


 

"Hello Seattle..."

Late Night Recording. Oh goodness. I am currently recording with my artists until 1am then again from 4-9am. It has been fun so far, I think we are all very tired though. I really do love these guys, Lisa, Rachel, Justin, and Derek. Couldn't have a better group to work with here. Absolutely love it :-) For example I walk into the studio with my hat, pink hoodie, and black sweats. Derek says " You look like a Bratz doll" too funny I say. Or when Justin wrecks the corner fort, good stuff here. On a serious note the song that's currently being recorded, is epic with a capital E. Right now there is a bit of mixing going on, then we are off to the Waffle House/Walmart. 

So Waffle House and Walmart was fun :) I bought a neato ghost pillow and blanket set...2.50. Thanks to Derek and Justin who saw them first. It's going to be pretty awesome for tour sleeping. I also scored a sweet Kool-aid shirt, it's purple (Go Bluffton). I am getting pretty tired now I can feel it settling in. But I'll make it, I get to do this instead of spending all night doing a paper. I am so blessed, thanks God :-)

Thoughts at this point in the semester...
Thanksgiving Break can't wait. 
Love these CMC folks. 
May or may not have wrote two songs...just for fun. 
Want to learn to play guitar maybe even electric. 
How much have I changed from September till now. 
What will it be like to be on my own. 
I wish I could capture memories and never let go.
Fall, cool air, and hoodies are my hero's right now. 
Can't express how much I appreciate songwriters.  


Goodnight all. 


<3 MusicMajor11 

I  miss you Hannah <3

"Yeah, but she got a tan and I got a sunburn, I got a sunburn..."

It seems like tour tensions are staying about the same. For me I am feeling mildly stressed, and a bit sleep deprived. Today's recording time is from 3pm-9pm, so a pretty long day. Tomorrow will equally be a very long night, as we are recording from 11pm-1am and then 4am-9am. Our plan is to stay up the whole time and include a Waffle House break. Can safely say that I've never had Waffle House early in the morning, kind of excited for that. Now I am not excited about the prospect of missing out on sleep. But I love my artists and what their doing so I'm for it. 

As tour quickly approaches and Thanksgiving Break looms in the distance I continue to be more antsy. I am really excited to go home but I really am going to miss my friends here at CMC. Even though I know that we come back for 2 weeks it's still going to be hard. 

Last night was a hard night of thinking for me. I am really questioning what I want to do with my life. I really think that music publishing is for me, but now I am concerned. I haven't really had a chance to read up on publishing, and it makes me concerned.Can I really do this if I chose to? It's really scary to know that this is my last year at home. I may be moving in the summer or fall. Not sure where I'll be, or where I'll live.But I do know that God is going to help me out. I certainly can't do this on my own. Nor will I be able to. Like I have said earlier, I believe that God will open the doors that need to be opened, and close the ones that need closing. So here's to waiting...and knowing that God will catch me as I take this leap. 


<3 MusicMajor11

My waiting face :-P

"You light, light, light up the sky You light up the sky..."

Tour Marketing. Oh goodness. Things are going okay at the moment, tensions are certainly high. I love all these people here, so for their sake I am trying to tread softly. I just think the stress of rehearsals, recording, masters, and tour are beating down on all of us. Thankfully I have been able to get my sleep and hang out with some pretty great people. That is why I am sane at the moment. I especially want to thank Rachel, she is a sweetheart and a wonderful friend. 

Right now I am in the studio with my artist Lizzy she is finishing up her first master! It sounds really great so far, its come a long way! I am fighting sleep right now, it's been a long day. My hopes are that I can rest this evening and just go to bed early, because I have recording 9-12pm tomorrow. The week is certainly flying by it's already Tuesday! 

The logo for the tour just came in a little while ago and I really hope it gets approved. It is truly fantastic!! Kudos to Lucas for it's creation!! 


I seem to have few words today, I think it is because I am tired. Well recording is almost through so I think this is it for now. 

P.S Enjoy some pics from this past weekend's Halloween Party! :) 

<3 MusicMajor11

Michelle and I

Me and Abby jumping off the stage

My roomie Amy and I

roommates!! :D

"Love is an ocean wide, we'll swim in the tears we cry..."

Well prep for tour is well underway and everyone is feeling the stress. The really nice thing is that all of our classes are canceled for this week :D This past weekend was pretty good, lots of late nights recording. Almost every night was till 3:30 or 4 am. So I slept in most days which was helpful. Sleep is one of those things I can't have less of. I went on a much needed Halloween shopping trip...got a Mario costume! Also I went with two of my five roommates to Chipotle my new favorite place to eat. Mmm burrito bowls. 


Last night was our Halloween party which was a blast. There were so many fun games! I participated in this one eating game. The object was to eat chunky peanut butter off of a piece of Plexiglas. There were two girls and two guys. Me and my friend Kyle won! Then me and him went head to head. That meant we had to share a piece of Plexiglas. We each had to lick the peanut butter off of our own side, it was sooo funny. Even though I felt like the peanut butter was choking me it was rewarding, I got a Chipotle gift card haha! Another quite interesting game was the musical chairs and donuts. In this twist of a classic game if you got out by not having a chair you ate a donut. Now the trick to this is that some of the donuts were normal while others had mustard, ranch, sour cream, and nacho cheese inside. Definitely a fun night :)


Today was nice, I got to sleep in and just talk with my friend and roommate Amy :) I have been at the CMC building since one today because of all the tour planning. Also there may or may not have been a trip to Sonic in there ;-) 


As for tour we are going to four different colleges, they are... Kentucky Christian 17th, Anderson 18th, Indiana Wesleyan 19th, and Taylor 20th. The really neat thing about this is that I can have my parents come pick me up from Taylor which is about 2 1/2 hours away from home!! I am so excited for Thanksgiving, it's only 19 days away.

I've been really thinking lately about family and how much they mean to me. I am so blessed to have such a loving family and that we are all so close. My little brother and I are just like best friends. Even though he is 17 and I am 21 we get along really well. I miss him so much, I didn't cry when saying goodbye to anyone except when it came to him. I just lost it. I can still picture the gray sky and tears that fell when I waved goodbye to him. But I can't wait for family time, Thanksgiving is one of the two big holidays that my family gets together for. I feel as if when I was younger I didn't really pay much attention to family things. But as time has passed I have taken great notice in them, and how I miss being a little kid. I was in such a hurry to grow up and now that I am grown up getting ready to start another chapter in my life it's hard. The great thing is I still know that little kid that used to play with Barbie's and play pretend for hours. I still know the little girl who dreamed big dreams and made wishes on stars. I am that same little girl just grown up and finding her way in the world. I miss being little. 


Well it's been a long day...goodnight everybody!

<3MusicMajor11




P.S Visit this website to check out my interview with Nashville Country Club about The Band Perry show that happened at the Opry...
http://nashvillecountryclub.com/Members/index.php?action=gallery;sa=view;id=2346 

"A falling star fell from your heart and landed in my eyes..."

Yet again it is time for another CMC LIVE. We are quickly approaching tour and thanksgiving break. There are three weeks till tour as of today which completely blows my mind. How can time go so quickly when it seems like just yesterday it was several months till I'd be home, now it is merely weeks. Tomorrow will be the day where we put together the "tour package" i.e the artists/bands that will be playing. This will be challenging but hopefully it will go over smoothly.

Today we went for a hike through a park for our exec class and we all got a chance to talk about things. That is why I love being here, we get to do fun spontaneous things like that. It really helps us to not become bored and stagnant. Even though I am usually a person who has to know what exactly is going on, not knowing sometimes is quite a blessing. 

Tonight is going to be a long night for me because one of my artists Justin is recording from 10pm-8am!! I will try to be there as long as I can. I have actually never stayed up that late before. So it will certainly be an adventure. Then my other artist Lizzy is recording from 10pm-2am Friday. The reason for this late recording is that the artist's first master recordings as due Monday, and since we had a late start getting into the studio... It has made it hard since the recording process can be tedious at times. I have noticed that drums seem to take the longest to mic and get set up. Also we only get one three hour recording session per week unless you book extra time. Three hours really isn't a lot of time to be honest. Even with all of this I think that my artist's will be just fine, their masters are going really well. 

I find myself increasingly being worn out. All this staying up late is beginning to catch up with me. But still I am trying to do my best to keep my head above water. I am trying to find time each day to where I can rest in the moment and just relax. So far so good, especially this week since I don't have an artist or a job. Such a BLESSING! I am going to really start digging into those publishing books, I have learned so much already about it. Also I ordered a book of Van Gogh's letters which I am looking forward to reading. 

One last bit of thinking I have done is to tell myself that God is truly bigger than any bad day I am having or any uncertain thoughts I have. It's good to know He's got it under control and that He knows where I am heading. Thank you God. 

<3 MusicMajor11

"Our God is greater, our God is stronger, God You are higher than any other..."

This weekend I had a wonderful time bonding with my roommates over fall food and mall shopping :-D I truly love those girls, they are so awesome. I am so blessed to be with such fantastic roommates! Sunday was a good day as well because I got to spend time with another friend, Rachel. We baked together which was a real blast. She really inspires me, she came to CMC thinking about working in music and now she knows that baking is her calling! I really hope that she gets into culinary school because she will blow them away! I am so happy for her. It's so nice to get to know people on another level. 

Monday was a day of business as we talked about our up and coming tour which is three weeks away from this Thursday, it's so hard to believe! I am on the marketing team and I am the merch manager for the tour which makes me really excited. It is going to be an experience of a lifetime! Even though I know that my calling isn't on the road it will still be a great time for me to grow and learn. I can't confirm the schools that we are visiting yet because they are not 100% certain but I will post them as soon as I know. It's going to be awesome, CMC Tour 2010! 

One sad note among all the happiness is that tensions are running high among everybody. I really think it is getting to the stressful point in the semester where everyone is taking it out on others. I try my best to stay out of the conflicts and provide positive energy but its hard sometimes. I really hate to see people not getting along, it breaks my heart. I just pray that God intervenes into these situations and causes hearts to be softened. But conflict is a part of living in a community like this. The important thing will be how we all deal with it and get it resolved. 

Today was a awesome day, one reason for that is I got to record my clarinet! My artist/friend Lizzy is doing a master recording of her original song. She performed it this past Thursday and she so graciously asked me to be involved! I was so excited about being asked to play let alone record. I had such a rush of energy recording today. It was so awesome to have the mics around my clarinet and the headphones on. We did three takes of the clarinet and I believe it sounded good. I was so humbled to have that opportunity! God is so awesome!!! He truly provided me with an excellent opportunity. It was so fun to record, I would definitely do it again for sure! I would also like to play again on another show but even if I don't I am still so happy. I didn't expect any of that to happen, let alone to get the feedback that I did :)

I am feeling hopeful about working in the music industry even as changing as it is. I feel like that is where I belong. Music is something that has been essential to my life, I couldn't imagine doing anything but music. Music gives me this feeling that I can't even describe. I love that feeling. This is just a dream, being around music 24/7 for a semester. We had Phil Keaggy come in today and it was such a blessing. He was so joyful and man could he play the guitar! He blew me away, the guy truly has a God given gift. I love this program and everyone it in. I just can't say that enough. I am so excited for the things to come as the semester progresses, it will be awesome. God has truly opened the doors for me and I can never thank Him enough for that. 

<3 MusicMajor11

Sound check for CMC LIVE!

My artist and I doing sound check

CMC LIVE Stage right before the show

Me performing with my artist on my clarinet!! :D

"It would be such a beautiful moment to see the look on your face..."

I would have to say that yesterday and today were the best days ever! I played clarinet with Lizzy (one of my two artists) on her original song and it went really well!! I was so happy and humbled that I got to be on stage playing the instrument I love. Everyone seemed to enjoy it as well which was exciting! One of the prof's even told me that it was one of the many outstanding moments in the show. I was so blessed by the statement. I am still blown away that he said that, and that everyone really liked it. God is fantastic!! His grace is enough! 

Also yesterday I had a meeting with one of the prof's and it seriously changed myself. After talking with him I really feel like I am called to live in Nashville :) We talked a lot of publishing which is what I am interested in pursuing after I leave this place and after I leave Bluffton. I just really feel like that being here has greatly guided me into what I am meant to do. I can't comprehend that God orchestrated all the moments in my life for a time like this. to be honest I had been struggling with being single and not being as content as I could be. But now it seems that it is all crystal clear, it's not the right time. God is so timely, always on time. I can't believe all this is happening at once. 

I was overcome by tears today when I realized how much God loves me. He loved me enough to provide this experience for me, and these awesome people. If I came back for another semester it wouldn't be the same without the people I am with now. They have taught me so much about myself and about life. I have seen God's love through them, and amazing musical talents. Like today this guy Dave here played with his band A Minor Bird...Oh.My.Goodness. They blew me away. Almost to tears. I highly recommend getting their album on itunes. So amazing. 

Just one last thought...God is right on time. Never forget that.

<3 MusicMajor11

"What am I supposed to do when the best part of me is always you..."

Yet again it is time for another CMC Live show. This week there are four artists going and two of them are mine ha. So I am basically managing half the show :-P It's good though, gives me lots of experience. Also I am playing on today's show with my clarinet. It came together really well the last couple of days. I am interested in how it is going to sound. I am not really too nervous about it, I am more excited than anything. I am just going to trust God that he will be with me and I am doing it for his Glory. 

This coming week I will be doing a lot of thinking. I met with one of my prof's today and talked about music publishing...completely blew my mind. Now I am not really sure what I want to do with me life. Do I get an internship and work my way up this summer? Do I move away from Mccomb this summer? Do I find a job in Nashville? I have no idea to be honest. At least I have one more semester to get things figured out. But I feel as though I could walk away from this place with a job for the fall. I really do want to find something that blesses God and that I will enjoy. 

Once again I feel as though I am free falling and I am still not sure where the ground is. Not sure if I am going to find out anytime soon, which scares and excites me. Only God knows where this will end, only He knows my future and what I am meant to do. One thing my pastor did say to me  in prayer before I left was that God would open the right doors and close the wrong ones. Well my prayer today for myself and everyone of you is that God opens those doors which need opening and shuts the wrong ones.

Here we go, show number six!!!! 

<3MusicMajor11

"Wherever you go, go with your whole heart" ~Confucius~

My heart is really aching right now. I had a fall out with one of my artists tonight. She needed to talk and we did but it didn't end well. I am struggling with blaming myself and being upset with her. Not really sure what to feel right now. I know music is what I am supposed to do. She isn't really sure about that, which is okay. But if I can be honest for a minute I think she'd be great. Excellent voice and stage presence. She literally rocked the house during her last show. Even though things didn't go quite so well tonight but I am still her biggest fan. Whether she thinks she can do it, I know she can. But the choice is up to her, if it's not what she wants that is fine. I just don't want her to give up. 

I am giving this my whole heart right now. It's hard because we are all under a lot of stress and working with little sleep. Everyone is still doing great, I am so proud of my artists. I love everyone here at the CMC, they are amazing people. I didn't think I would get this lucky to spend a semester with some of the coolest people ever. I cannot say how humbled I am to know them. God is fantastic. 

So another thing is that I am playing my clarinet on one of my artist's original songs, and that song is being recorded. I am so excited about that. I never though in a million years that I would get to record my clarinet. It's seriously like a dream, can't believe it. God is so good during the happy times and sad. I love Him so very much. He has blessed me immeasurably! 

I encourage you to go with your whole heart into whatever God calls you to do. 

<3 MusicMajor11

"If your lost and look-and you will find me time after time..."

Today has been one of those days...Hammer Time went well for the most part. I am struggling with being really busy with two artists performing this week. Also we are starting recording which is a whole different ball game. I am confident that I can do it but still it's really crazy!

However I am really pumped about being asked to play my clarinet on my artist's song! Also the neatest part is that the song is being recorded . I can't believe me and my clarinet will be recorded. I never thought that I would have a chance to perform on my clarinet with this type of music. God works in mysterious ways, He also surprises you when you least expect it. I practiced it with my artist yesterday and it sounded good together. I am a little nervous about playing this Thursday but I just figure that I am doing it to give Glory to God and to have fun. I will have to use ears and attend sound check not only to help my artists but to actually play. God.is.good. 

I am really wondering here lately where I will be after this and after Bluffton. I can't really see where I will be next summer or even next fall. I kind of have a blindfold on to be honest. But really I think it is a good thing. My best friend/cousin Dustin once told me that if he had the choice to have all of his life laid out before him or not know what was going to happen, he choose to not know. I believe that he is right, because if you did know you would try to avoid the hurtful things and rush head first towards the good things. As hard as it is to think God has went before us and He knows where all of us are headed. I am also reminded that what happens on this earth is not forever. It is so easy for me to get caught up in the little things and worrying. When really none of that has eternal value. I believe that living and loving each day for the Glory of God is my purpose. To smile, laugh, cry, and just love until the end of time. God has given us so many beautiful things that have eternal value and yet I choose to worry about the silly things that will not matter.I love my life even when I do have those crappy days and I feel like giving up. 

Even though my future is uncertain I do know that God never changes. He is the same yesterday today and forever. Wow. Just check that again, never changes. To me that is so powerful, because so many things in all of our lives change and shift around. But God He doesn't. God-Thanks for that, I can always count on you when I feel like I have nothing else. 

To end my post I would like to leave you all with a phrase that was coined by Bach. SOLI DEO GLORIA. This means to GOD be the Glory. I encourage you to do everything for his Glory even if it is doing homework or taking a walk with a friend. Give it all to the One who never changes. 

<3 MusicMajor11

"Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars..."

I keep thinking that I am going to wake up from this dream. I am learning music with talented awesome people and having the time of my life. If this was a dream I definitely wouldn't want to wake up. I have never felt so strongly about where I belong. I know that in my heart I couldn't be happier right now than being here in Nashville.


God has been really stretching me since I have been here. I have done so many things that are wayyy outside of my comfort zone, and I am happy about it. Sure there are certainly sometimes when it frustrates me but I am willing to learn. I am willing to wait because there is something great on the other side. 


Shooting stars are fleeting and they are only there for a brief moment in time. I looked for them all summer and found a few. I am pretty sure one of my wishes came true. 


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Good times with friends :-)

Me, Michelle, and Lizzy :)

"Just a small town girl livin' in a lonely world..."

Here we go, it's time for another show! Can't believe it's already Thursday. So much has happened and will be happening. First of all we are all preparing to start recording in the studio soon! To which I will be my artist Justin's executive producer or co-producer depending on what he would like me to do. I will be in charge of making sure everything is ready and that the band members are informed. Also I just need to be there as a support and a person to bounce ideas off of. I am quite excited about this process because my artist has got it. He is wonderfully talented and I know that his master recordings are going to be sweet! When it comes to this recording process we will have four three hour slots of time with the chance of additional time which will be figured out in a lottery. This lottery time ranges from 12am-8am! So there are going to be some coffee induced comas in my future :-P Actually if all possible I really want to avoid that haha.

With all of this recording we are needed to also promote our artist by making a website complete with pictures and a bio. This part is really exciting for me because I have a little experience in this area. I have my pictures picked out and I am in the process of thinking through a bio blurb. Plus I have some demos of Justin's songs. All in all this is going to be a really neat experience. 

Now if that wasn't enough to be busy with the execs (my track!) are going to be planning our tour! This tour is going to be a lot of work with very rewarding outcomes. We have to work on everything from budget to logos to merch ect. There are so many things for us to be working on and looking forward to. I absolutely cannot wait for this to happen. 

The weeks have been speeding along so fast, I know I keep saying it but it is so unbelievable. It seems like every time we get a hold of everything it's Thursday again. That is definitely the case this week. I am trying my best to take each day at a time and enjoy the moments God's given me. I just know that it is going to be so hard to return to Bluffton after this experience. Don't get me wrong I do want to go back to Bluffton but this experience has truly changed my life. I really do believe I will end up here after I graduate college in May. Not 100% about it but I just have this feeling. I know that God will provide me with the direction that I need to go. For right now I am just free-falling enjoying the ride down. I have my worries and concerns yes-but overall I am just trying to trust God to pull my parachute at the right time. I don't know how far from the ground I am, and I believe that God is determining that. He has got me in His hands, I trust him with all I have. Here's to enjoying the free-fall!! 

<3 MusicMajor11

"Tell me darlin' do you wish we'd fall in love..."

Things are going really well :-) My artist Justin is doing fantastic! He has such an awesome voice and stage presence. I know that he will go far, and it is truly an honor to work with him. Classes are going great too, I am learning so much about the music industry. Things that previously I didn't have a clue about. Apartment life is going awesome as well, I love my roommates they are awesome girls! I would just say that all my fellow CMC'ers are great, each one of them are talented and fun to be with. I am so so so glad that I came when I did. 

This week I am being an MC with Ariel for Thursday show! I am excited but also nervous because this requires public speaking skills. I do have a feeling though that it will turn out just fine :-) Especially with the help of God's peace.

I find myself more and more thinking about who I am and what it means to be me. Each day I think that I am getting a clearer picture of what that means. I hope to return home with a different attitude than when I left.

I'll leave you with this really awesome quote by Dr. Henry Cloud from the book, The Secret Things of God... "Trust God, and lock your car-no matter how safe the parking lot looks." 

<3 Music Major11

Me after producing CMC Live #4 with my awesome roommate Theresa!

Downtown Nashville <3

DownTown :-)

"I throw my hands up in the air sometimes..."

Well it's been a great weekend so far, for me it started Thursday with the awesome show. It went really well. We all had a great time together at the after party journeying through the woods and making caramel apples.

Friday had to be one of my favorite days so far. We went roller skating as a community activity and dressed up like nerds. Oh. My. Goodness. So funny. One of my favorite nerd outfits was probably Dave, he was hysterical. I just had so much fun bonding and laughing with everyone. I am such a horrible roller skater! Luckily Lizzy held my hand and we manged to stay on our feet most of the time haha. I managed to wipe out and land flat on my butt. I couldn't stop laughing so I barely got up. I feel like I started to get the hang of it which was exciting :-) Then I went with Ariel and she really helped me to skate on my own. Overall it was one of the funnest experiences I have had here. After our roller skate adventure a group of us went to Sweet CeCe's in Franklin to get Fro-yo. It was so good, we all had a great time laughing and just hanging out. 

Today was really awesome, seeing downtown Nashville is a blast. I went with two of my roommates and we explored the area. We went into several boot shops and Bath Junkie! It was just really cool to walk around the city and just watch the people. Nashville is just a really neat place to be. It's so different than small town McComb or Bluffton. But its a refreshing difference. I am really considering living here after I graduate college, but then again that is up to the Big Man Upstairs :-) 

We are already five weeks into the program, it's still so hard to believe. Each day I find myself in total awe of how much this was meant to be. I don't believe for a second that coming here was an accident. I know that God made a way for all this to happen. And I can't thank Him enough. He is so immeasurably good to me, a sinner. God, I love you <3

<3 MusicMajor11

"Fill This Space"

Well today is show number 4!!! So hard to believe that we are going to be half way done with the shows already. Theresa (one of my roommates) and I are producing the show and so far it is going well! We are going to have a really great after party with caramel apples and roasting marshmallows!

There are a lot of fun things going on this weekend and I am pretty excited. I am going to try my hand at learning the acoustic guitar :-) Also me, my artist, Michelle, and her artist are going to hang out this weekend over dinner which is fun! 

<3 Music Major11

"I'd like to make myself believe that planet earth turns slowly..."

This has been one of the coolest weekends I have had in a long time :-) I got to have a great movie night with two of my roommates. Also I got to see the Grand Ole Opry for free with Abby and Michelle. It was a blast especially since we saw the renovations they did since the flood. Plus we got to see Brothers Trouble and The Band Perry! Truly it was an amazing day, and it was nice to have fun and relax. Today me, Michelle, and Abby visited a new church, Rolling Hills Community Church. It was so awesome, I am pretty sure that we are going to go back. They are doing a series on being Fearless. Soooo awesome! 

Today has been a day of reflection for me. I keep thinking about how fast time goes. It just seems that when you start to get the hang of something it starts to go by faster and faster. I mean we are going to be doing our 4th show this week and then that means we are half way done. I can hardly believe the time that has past. It just seems like every week goes by with anticipation to the next show. Everyone is constantly preparing for the next show by writing, singing, playing, planning, and preparing. By the time the show is over the next one is already in the works. I love this way of learning though. I get to sleep, eat, breathe music 24.7. It's going to be hard to go back to Bluffton and start up regular classes and classical music again. Not that I don't love classical music but it's so different than this. This is what I  am meant to do. 

Bluffton has been a journey of a lifetime. I have made so so many memories there. It's going to be exciting to go back but also sad. I know that I only have one semester left and it's going to go by fast. So here's to all of you Bluffton friends, profs, mentors, and awesome people I know. I will probably never know the full extent of how you all have affected me. Thank you for being there for me and for being amazing. I love you all. 

<3 MusicMajor11

"Yesterday, Today, and Forever You are faithful and I will trust in You..."

SO glad that stage managing is done! Phew, it was a lot of hard work but it paid off. Granted it was not perfect but I felt like I did my very best and my team survived. There were a couple of errors like a missing guitar cable, mic problem, and such but overall I think it went great. Also this week was Round 2 (3 songs and background vocals). So each artist (there were seven) had to play 3 songs. This required a lot of set changing which can get crazy. Especially when you are dealing with mics and making sure each person has the right one. But it was handled well and then tomorrow we start the whole process over again to prepare for our next (4th) show! I cannot believe how fast this semester is flying! It just seems like yesterday I was just getting here. But now we are already in October, so crazy. 

I just keep wondering, where will I'll be after this program is over. I already cannot comprehend all the growing I've done, or things I learned or friends I have made. Time will surely show me what all has taken place. But for now I am completely amazed at how God knew I was going to be here before I was born.  I just can't believe how good God is to a sinner like me. I am just overwhelmed at his grace. God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. I am so thankful for that because I know I am not always the same, but He is. Somehow I know that all that happens here is going to change my life as I know it. I can just remember being a high school senior deciding that I wanted to do music over accounting. Plus going into music business instead of music education! What a life God planned for me. Music is just so glorious, it gives me goosebumps, makes me cry, laugh, smile. It gives me this feeling nothing else does, and being around it 24/7 is perfect. 

I'd like to leave you with a quote I wrote for class with Tom one day..."Art is giving flight to the soul and letting it soar with God"-Danielle 

Goodnight everyone!

<3 MusicMajor11

"When violet eyes grow brighter and heavy wings grow lighter..."

Well I am still kind of freaking out today still about the whole stage manager thing. I am not sure if I can do it, there are so many changes and implications. I want to make this a very smooth show, but I still have no idea where to start! I know that I can do it but I still just feel overwhelmed by the whole idea of it. But I know that God will help me I just need to really seek Him during this time of trouble. 

Other than that I did have a mishap with my computer battery, it is in the process of dying. So I got on the Dell website only to find that the battery would cost me 135.99! So I decided to shop around and found it for 32.89 on Amazon! I was so happy that I found it so cheap. I really love this computer and I don't want to have to get a new one (that is until I decide to get a mac :-P) But for the time being this computer suits me just fine. 

Tonight is going to be a night of pressing in hard to get things done, God give me the strength. 

CMC Building!

Brentwood Estates

<3 MusicMajor11